Hannibal x Reader - Bloodstream

It was a rare occasion when Hannibal couldn't sleep. He wasn't the kind of person to let daily life interfere with his dreams.

But he had been awake all night, unable to fall asleep. He felt guilty. 

He was sure she was gone by now. She was probably at home, sleeping soundly. He sighed and got out of bed. It was no use lingering on the past, so he thought. He changed into a dress shirt and a vest, slightly more underdressed than usual. He was not in the mood to dress fully; he didn't have any plans anyway. He had decided that he would stay home and rest. 

He made the bed, drew the curtains and put his books back on the shelf. He closed his bedroom door and walked down the long hallway into the living room. 

She was sleeping on the couch. He was mildly surprised, though he didn't show it. He looked at her closely. 

Her face was flushed and her eyelashes were shining with tears. He sat down on the couch and rested his hand on her shoulder. She stirred slightly. Her lips parted and she let out a sigh. He ran his fingers through her hair, letting the soft strands sweep between his fingers like silk. He tangled his fingers in her hair and let them rest there that way. God, she smelled so wonderful.

Hannibal assumed it was about a half an hour later when she woke up. Although her emotions were somewhat muted from her drowsiness, he could still see the terror etched into her features. He pulled his fingers out of her hair. She sat up quickly and edged away from him. She couldn't even glance at him. 

He didn't try to make her.

The fight had been bitter and their words had been cutting and sharp. It had started out strained, but relatively even-toned until suddenly, they were shouting. Then he said it. The words he wished he could swallow again.

The words she'd been ready to say had died on her lips. Her face had faltered into an expression of pure fear. 

He'd been shocked by it himself.

The quiet had arrived like a ghost, blanketing the room. He'd spun around and gone to his room and locked the door.

He swallowed awkwardly. How was he supposed to carry out this conversation? He knew that he could potentially lose her if he didn't. He settled on the most obvious and direct thing to say.

"I'm so sorry," he said.

Her eyes flashed up to his chest, but she still didn't meet his eyes.

"I could never hurt you." He could tell his voice was getting quieter.

Her eyes flickered up to meet his, but they dropped again.

"Please forgive me," he murmured.

She nodded slowly.

Another silence fell over them and he closed his eyes. He reached out to her and he saw her flinch. His fingers curled in, in hesitation. He unbent his fingers and reached for her again, letting his fingers brush her cheek. He felt fresh tears there.

"No, don't cry," he said softly.

He felt another roll of guilt. He liked building walls; it had always been something he'd taken pleasure in. If one decided to climb the wall, they were worthy of his time and his company and he was of theirs. But he was unaccustomed to others building walls for him to climb.

He didn't like it at all. 

The spaces in between
Two minds and all the places they have been
The spaces in between
I try to put my finger on it
I try to put my finger on it

He moved over to her. He was pleased when she didn't move away. "You must believe me when I say I couldn't hurt you."

Hannibal was having trouble thinking of something convincing. If he blurted out all the things he'd ever wanted to say to her, he'd appear to be a trembling, overemotional wreck. He was conflicted. He definitely wished to tell her, but he didn't want to seem to be incapable of keeping calm under stress. 

The debate within didn't last very long. 

"I want to tell you that I love you, and that I'd do anything for you. You are one of the few things I think about outside of work and the like." He paused, keeping his tongue in check. "I understand that the word 'love' is sort of strange to hear, coming from me, isn't it?" 

She nodded slowly and smiled apologetically. 

He chuckled softly. "I understand. But you believe me, don't you?"

The doubt coloring his voice was more obvious than he'd intended. 

She nodded. He smiled and pulled her closer to him. He pressed his lips to her forehead.

"Hannibal?" Her voice was still slightly fearful. He guessed it would take a few days for it to wear off.

"Yes?" he asked. 

"I love you too," she said quietly. He smiled.

He'd breached her wall.